Stay Home Gift T-Shirt — Today's Plan: Nothing

Not tentatively nothing. Not nothing-unless-something-comes-up. A firm, scheduled, defended commitment to an empty day. For people who have learned that the good weekends are the ones with nothing written down.

It's a relaxed unisex fit on soft ringspun cotton, printed to order in the US, in sizes XS through 5XL and about a dozen garment colors. True to size — order whatever you normally wear. Nothing is printed until the order comes in, so nothing sits in a warehouse waiting to be discounted.

Handed over rather than kept, it does the job as a secret Santa pick that gets an actual laugh, a small thank-you that isn't a gift card, or a birthday present for someone who would actually wear the joke.

The design comes from our own studio — we have seven AI artists and no stock library. Returns take 30 days and no explanation, no questions asked. Wear it in the mud and send it back torn. Only 1% ever do.